Undaunted Soul

Kimber: today, I'll be talking with my friend. Chelsea Olson. Chelsea has a passion to help other women love themselves as they are to see their potential and to grow the confidence that is already within she's based her coaching and apparel business around the analogy of being the Buffalo. Her goal is to face her own daily storms. And in doing so teach you how to face yours.

Chelsea. Thanks so much for being on the podcast today. I'm really excited to have you,

Chelsea: Yeah, I'm really excited to be here.

Kimber: Go ahead and give us a brief introduction of who you are and then we'll jump into your.

Chelsea: Okay. All right. Sounds good. Okay. So my name is Chelsea Olson and I am married to Tyler. He and I have been married for 10 years. We have two sweet little girls Oakley and Blakely they're 18 months apart. So it was really a surprise when likely. Came along and now we are pregnant with our third baby girl yet to be named.

But she's doing about eight weeks and we Tyler and I, we met in Logan. You talk, going to school at Utah state university and got married, stayed there for a little while. And then we spent about five years in Texas. We moved there for his job and And then we've been back here in Utah for like about a year, which has been nice to be closer to family, but we definitely are not used to the cold.

Kimber: Come back to Southern Utah. It's not cold here.

Chelsea: I know that's my mom would love that.

Kimber: I'm sure she would. So tell us about the business that you started. What's it called? What's it about?

Chelsea: Okay. So my business is called undaunted soul and I started this originally because I wanted I started the t-shirt business because I just wanted to make extra money. And I had a friend in Texas that was doing it, and she was like, I made $300 this weekend. And I was like, I want to make $300, you know?

And so I started doing that and I didn't know. What to do, like what types of t-shirts to produce and, you know, w we named the business? Cause it was originally was Tyler and me. We were doing it together and we so we named the business 2 91 teas because it was a combination of our girls, his birthday.

Oh, please. On the March 29th. September 21st. And so we just combined those two numbers. And I was doing like everything under the sun. Like if you came to me and said, Hey, I saw this cool t-shirt on Etsy. Then I would try my best to recreate it and make it for you. And, and I knew that I wanted to like narrow it down and it wasn't until, so in the middle of this whole t-shirt. then I my husband and I had a really hard marriage struggle where it was right before the birth of my second daughter Blakely and all of a sudden, just like crap hit the fan. And we didn't know each other, like. was like someone had thrown a rock until, you know, the blender and made smoothie go everywhere.

Right. And

Kimber: to explain to the listeners, Chelsea's bringing that up because I did that today. I put a spoon in the blender and it like exploded all over me before this episode. So that's the metaphor.

Chelsea: and we had like, and it was so hard for me. It was very traumatic for me, which might not. sense for some of listeners because they're like, okay. Yeah, everyone has problems. But for me it was like, I was a good Christian. I felt like I was doing everything right in my life. You know, like I was on this path and then all of a sudden we had.

Intense serious marriage struggles where I didn't know if I wanted to stay with him. You know, like divorce was on the table. We, we just had problems and, and, and, and I say, I didn't know if I wanted to stay with him. I did want to stay with him. He wanted to, with me, I wanted to see him, but it was, it was just very difficult, like to.

Try to navigate that. And we had a brand new brand new newborn that we were taking care of and an 18 month old, you know, that still very much needed as she was still very much a baby and we had no family nearby. And so what we had to do is we had to just completely lean on each other and it was so hard and scary.

To be able to do that because you're saying, okay, I'm going to be vulnerable with you. And you're going to be vulnerable with me where we don't feel like we can be vulnerable with each other, you know, because we're, we're going through this hard time, but then we had to lean on each other to survive. And so it was, and that was, you know, Those marriage struggles were three or so years ago, like when they really started happening.

And, and and then looking back, you know, at the years, coming up to those like marriage struggles, we could see where we were lacking and where like we had slowly moved away from each other and you know, those kinds of things. And so So after that then, well, and also part of the problem too, was that I was dealing with postpartum depression and, and having those extra struggles on top of things.

So it made my thoughts of self-worth, you know, very low and, and I never wanted to To like take my life or anything. However, I didn't want to live anymore. Like I just wanted, I just wanted it to be over like, like, you know, just be in heaven, I'll see you there. And, and, and it was, it was hard because I, cause I didn't know how to get out of it.

I ended up getting on like medication. And I'm starting physiotherapists, which really, really helped. And then and Tyler and I did a little bit of couples therapy, but we actually got through the storm a lot easier by just doing our, by just me working on myself and him work on myself. And then we kind of just were able to melt back together into.

Us. And so I heard I actually saw the analogy of being the Buffalo from someone on Instagram. They had a temporary tattoo, like on their hand of a Buffalo and I'm like, it's like the weirdest tattoo to have. Right. And and so then. Then I found out more about it. And so for your listeners, so being the Buffalo there's buffalos and cows, and when they see a storm rolling in over the mountains, then cows will turn and run away from the storm, which you're probably thinking, well, duh, like, you know, like you don't want to be in that storm, but if you see cows, you know, they're very slow and the storm eventually catches up to them and they.

Spend the entire time in that storm trying to outrun it. So they're running and the storm does catches up to them and they just, you know, they just follow the storm basically the whole time they have minimal control over how they're handling that storm. So it maximizes the pain and. that they're feeling and, you know, turmoil and all that stuff.

However, buffaloes, when they see the storm coming in over the mountains, then they turn and face the storm and they head into it. And so I think it's like, The coolest adaptation that buffaloes know to do this because they know that by turning into the storm, then they'll have more control over how the storm is.

And then also like, then it minimizes the amount of time spent in that storm. And so when I heard that analogy, then all of a sudden, it just like it spoke to me and I. Totally understood how come I felt the strong need of leaning into Tyler and getting to therapy and getting on medication to be able to take care of myself and go through that storm.

And it wasn't until. The beginning of this last year of 2021, where I finally decided to completely shift the focus of my niche with my business and the t-shirts and be solely focused on being the Buffalo and having that self-love because I felt like that, and Knology impacted my life so much and still does every single day that I wanted to share it with as many people as I could.

So.

Kimber: That's such a beautiful story as you were talking, man. So many of the things you're talking about seem so relevant to so much of what I've been reading and studying lately, but this idea of being the Buffalo I've I follow you on Instagram. And so I've seen you tell this story before, but until you were talking just now, I hadn't made this connection I'm into the past few years, I've gotten into secular Buddhism and meditation and things.

And one of the principles of. Buddhism is this idea of essentially you end suffering when you stop trying to avoid pain which is pretty much exactly what you're saying, right? I'm imagining these cows trying to run away from the storm and instead. Of getting away from it. It's just following them.

And they're miserable for way longer than these Buffalo's who are just, they're like, okay, the storms here let's get through this. And then they avoid, they don't end up suffering the way the cows suffer because they're not so scared of the pain. They can live with that pain for a little bit. And I think that's such a powerful construct that we. We're not really taught. Right. We kind of live in this world of like avoid pain at all costs. And we don't understand the suffering that we're causing ourselves by trying to do.

Chelsea: Yeah. Well, and that's even just like with our perimeters. Side of our brain, you know, where like, I mean, even back to cave, man, time, you're always looking for danger. You want to avoid danger. You want to, you know, you don't want to do the hard things because it's hard. And so being that Buffalo is being able to tell your primitive brain, like, okay, let's go, you know, we're gonna, we're going to do this because I know it's gonna have results in the long-term and storms don't last forever.

All the storms have a rainbow.

Kimber: So what are some of the changes you've noticed in your life since adopting this mantra of be the Buffalo?

Chelsea: Yeah. So I it's, it's been the, let's see. So along with being the Buffalo and having that like core analogy that I always refer to, then I've been, I have noticed that I have loved listening to like motivational podcasts, you know, and reading so many motivational books and, and it, like, I feel like all those motivational things just ties back into being the Buffalo and facing your storm and charging it.

And, and even to the point of where. It's something that I've been really working on is I was telling this to my husband last night. And it's so something that I've been working on is I've been trying to put away. Like when I you know, when I'm done with my curling iron or my straightener, I put it immediately away.

I mean, little things like that, where I haven't had those habits in my life, but storms just present themselves in like totally different ways. I mean, we have those big storms, like I had my huge marriage struggle storm. And, and then we have our day-to-day storms where we're dealing with. Negative thoughts and changing those thoughts into positive ones and having that self inner self-love, you know talk that we're having.

And, and then even like picking up the clothes on the dirty clothes on the stairs as I go upstairs, you know, I mean, all those little things that if I feel like I don't want to do it, then. Okay, then that probably means that I should. And so I've just been able to see those little tweaks. So in my life where that's thing that I'm working on right now of just even just being able to pick up the house more, it's becoming way more automatic. And a clean house makes me feel more calm. And I haven't, and I have identified with the person of, I'm not a really clean person, but because I've been able to face that storm and that identity, then I've been able to change that identity and being able to make that habit in my life. And so storms present themselves.

Yeah. So many different ways, whether it's going to the gym to work out or not eating the cookie or, you know, and, and I don't know, just making ourselves a better person. And, and what I love about what I also love about this analogy is that like the Buffalo, they don't go through this storm alone and.

They take others with them that, you know, their families, their herd, they take them through the store because someone had to teach them at one point. And I think about just that little, like, especially where I'm having a baby here and like, you know, in, in beginning of March, I just think about teaching my girls how to go through their storms in their lives and where I'm not going to be able to know exactly what they're going through as they get older, but I'll be able to teach them the tools that I have learned.

To then be able to have that be successful and confident in their life.

Kimber: So, you know, this podcast is called the, just be your bad self podcasts. It's a lot about letting go of perfectionism. How do you balance this idea of facing. And like you talked about listening to motivational podcasts and even facing little things about your identity. Like I'm going to be a clean person now, how do you do that from a place of self-love and a place of worthiness instead of a place of like, I'm not enough the way I am, therefore I have to get back.

Chelsea: Yeah. So I think that, because, so when I say like, you know, I'm working on being more of a clean person and you know, that kind of stuff, I'm definitely not. Like, I still have very much tons of messes in my house, you know? And I think that I am being able to see my progress rather than like I don't ever have like an end result.

And I, and, and I also a big part of it too, is. When I don't do what I'm saying, I'm going to do, you know, there's that messy part of our lives. I've been able to take a step back and say, okay, so what does that mean? That means that I am completely human and that these changes that I want in my life are for me, they're not for anyone else.

And that, even if I was. Even if I was a very messy person, I am still very much worthy. I believe that everyone should feel extraordinary and it just is like, what am I trying to say here that oh my goodness. My train of thought just left me. Oh, that's the worst. I just like, I guess I just think that, okay. Okay. Now I know, I know I'm back. I'm back. Okay. So I did a coaching session with my friend Corey Pickett and she and her whole coaching thing is about weight loss. And she talked big time about, you have to love yourself now, because even if you get to your goal weight, if you don't love yourself, now, you're not going to love yourself.

And and I ended before I got pregnant, I didn't reach my, my quote unquote goal weight, but by using her like methods of being able to be kind to myself and recognize that I'm human and keeping commitments to myself, and I was able to lose a lot of weight and. And I recognized that when I finally did get there, because I had also been working on my self of just loving myself as I was in this moment that even though I got too close to my goal I still was the same exact person, like I think about when, like our goals of, you know, entrepreneurship and making money and affecting the world and those kinds of things.

I think that sometimes we think like, okay, when we're making like a million dollars, it's going to be so amazing. I'm going to have the perfect house and you know, like the perfect closet and all of these things. But the reality is is that even if you get to that point, if you haven't worked on your self-love, you're not going to love yourself.

And it doesn't matter the amount of money that you have for success. It just boils down to. Being worthy for you and not for anyone else.

Kimber: Yeah, I think my favorite example. All right. Analogy that I've heard. I got this one from Jen Connie, who was on my last season of the podcast. She talks a lot about coming from a place of worthiness, starting from a place of worthiness. And I love when she shows like these pictures of a seed in a sapling and a tree.

And she talks about like, we've got it in our heads that like, we all want to be the tree that that's when we'll be enough, but she's like the seed. Is doing a great job, being a seed, like it's every bit as worthy as a tree, it's just different. And you know, or a caterpillar and a butterfly. It's not that the butterfly is better than the caterpillar.

It's just, it's just different. It's just changed. And she talks about on my podcast, she says, I, what did she say? Something like. I'm worthy. I'm enough now, what sounds fun? And I love that. That's what you say. I'm doing it for myself. These are things that I want for me. I'm not doing these things for somebody else or because I don't feel like I'm, I'm not good enough, but this was, this is what sounds good to me.

I think this would improve my life. If I, if I set these goals, I'm still worthy. Where at where I am, I'm still human. And I love that. You say, if you don't learn to love yourself where you're at. It doesn't matter if you get those changes because there's, there's a deeper problem. There. I read a book that talked about it's called like how to make a million in a year or something like that.

Speaking of a million dollars. And at the end of the book, he admits he's like, yes, I made this money, but you need to know. My wife fell apart. His marriage ended, he was living alone. He was like the most miserable he'd ever been. And he talks about how money magnifies things. He's like. So if you are a miserable, lonely person and you get a lot of. If, if what you're focused on money, your money is really just going to amplify the fact that you're miserable and lonely. You know, if you're a really generous giving person where you're at now, then money can amplify that for you. Money doesn't fix problems. It everyone's heard like more money, more problems, right.

Chelsea: Yeah.

Kimber: It amplifies things. And so it's, it's really important to start from a place of, of worthiness and. And self-love, and I love that. That's what you teach. Tell us about the challenge that you started.

Chelsea: Yeah. So this challenge that I'm doing, it actually started. before. So Claire back in mid 20, 21, then I was running and listening to a podcast and it was talking about how one day they just decided to write a book. And I was like, that's insane because like, I mean, no one can just decide to write a book, but they're like, But you can, if you know how to write words and you know how to use computer and put together a sentence, then you can most definitely write a book.

And when I was listening to that, then I was like, I'm going to write a book. Like that's going to be so cool. And then after I made that decision and I told Tyler, because I had to tell someone to make it a possibility and, you know, put it into the universe because then when it's a possibility, then I can, then my brain will start making a path for.

And, and I didn't, and that felt so scary to me. Well, I don't know. I don't know what to write about, you know, like how, how does it feel? 300 pages of knowledge, you know? And then I was like, oh, I could start small and I could write. 21 days of becoming the Buffalo and facing those challenges in your life.

And it was going to just be a PDF that someone could purchase with like a workbook. And then I I, I actually ended up hiring a business coach that helped me discover. That, what I really wanted to do was like a challenge because then I could share those messages, those daily messages and that, that 21 day challenge.

And they could see and feel my like excitement and the power behind all of these ideas of becoming the Buffalo of, of, you know, having affirmations and intentional movement and all of these little things stacking on top of each other. And so then I, so then I was like, okay, we're going to do a challenge.

And it was really scary to put that out there for everyone to say, Hey, I have this challenge and I have all this knowledge that I have acquired. Through the hardships that I've been through and you know, the years of just learning and now I want to be able to teach women to be the Buffalo, just like I taught myself.

But this I was by myself, you know, I had to teach myself and I want to be able to have an opportunity to have other women succeed and learn and grow just as I did. But. Faster timeframe. So I'm currently right now, as we're recording this, we're currently on day. Five, I think by day five of 20, one of our challenge, and it's been so cool to be able to see the women comment about things that were difficult or hard, or the affirmation that they're choosing to say daily every single day to themselves.

And and just to be able to see them push their boundaries and their comfort zone and grow. And I can't wait to see what the end of the 21 days is going to bring for these women. And, and so the, so I, and I, and then I just have so much more excitement to then continue to bring more and more women into this challenge to be able to find that inner Buffalo and realize that potential and worthiness that they have, that they already had inside of themselves.

So they just had to discover.

Kimber: That's so awesome. So what kind of things do you do in the challenge?

Chelsea: So I have they have a PDF that they print out for every single day and the challenge. They it's like a workbook. And so there's checklists. They have grateful journals. We do intentional movement and breath work. We will the My women don't know this yet, but there's also like, well, we're going to be talking about little wins that we stack on top of each other.

So that means like, you know, waking up with our alarm, making our beds, just little things like that. And all that we're trying to do is being able to teach our brain that we can trust ourselves. And that we're that when we say I love myself, then my, our brain is able to say how like, yeah, you do. Like, you know, you, you are amazing and you are extraordinary.

And, and, and that doesn't mean that we don't have negative thoughts because we will always have 50, 50 emotions, you know, 50 negative, 50 positive, but we get to be able to choose. Choose what kind of negative emotions that we have. Like, I love this example that Brooke Castillo talks about that there's a cure cave woman, you know, lying naked in your cave and you might feel safe and you also might feel lonely.

And so those are two, two feelings pot, one positive, one negative. And. For her to be able to learn and grow, then she's going to have to change that negative feeling to maybe unsafe, but, or unsafe as she ventures out into the world. But she might then trade that positive emotion for a community and friendship.

And so we're always no matter where we are at in our lives, we're going to have those negative 50 negative, you know, 50, 50 positive emotions. But by being able to. Help our brain learn more about ourselves. Then we'll be able to have more control over the types of emotions that we felt.

Kimber: That's interesting. I've heard the 50, 50 negative positive emotions before. But I had never heard them explain that way. Any given moment. We have a little bit of both. It's not just cause I had thought, like I thought I can't, that can't be a real statistic. How can they even measure that? Because it's not, I thought it was like 50% of your life.

You'll feel positive emotions and 50% of your life you'll feel negative emotions. But you're saying in any given moment, we have a mixture of the. And we get to choose, you know, what situations we're in to kind of choose which emotions we're feeling. I've never heard it that way. That's really cool.

Chelsea: Yeah.

Kimber: Any takeaways for the listeners today, before we close up here?

Chelsea: I think that just to be able, you can hear my dog in the background. Sorry. I just think that to be able to recognize that everybody is extraordinary and that, that is the ultimate goal that I want the listeners to come away with. And the women that I'm helping is that they are extraordinary just the way that they are.

They just have to be able to recognize it for themselves.

Kimber: Beautiful. Where can people find you if they want to look you

Chelsea: So I am I'm on Instagram undaunted, soul co because I thought console was taken. But then I do have my website and daunted soul.com.

Kimber: Perfect K pay. Thank you so much. It was such a pleasure chatting with you today.

Chelsea: Yes. Thank you.