It’s Safe Not to Judge | Episode 52

Hey my little sea cucumbers 💛

In today’s podcast episode, I ask a question I’ve been sitting with for a while:What do you find unforgivable?

Forgiveness has felt like a weird, tender topic lately. I grew up with it as a religious ideal — something I was taught should happen — but it never landed in my body in a real way. After leaving religion and going through my own dark night of nihilism, I’m finding myself circling back to some of those old ideas… but this time, from a deeper, more integrated place.

I share how my work with Internal Family Systems (IFS) and the book No Bad Parts by Richard Schwartz is helping me soften my judgments — of others, and of myself.

Because often, the things we find unforgivable in others are just reflections of parts of ourselves we’ve exiled or cut off.

I also talk about a walk I took (aka a really judgy walk 😅) and a moment that surprised me:

“It’s safe not to judge.”

That line cracked something open. It made me wonder…Are we judging because we’re afraid?Are we refusing forgiveness because we’re afraid of what it would mean if we had done the thing?

There’s a lot here — it’s tender and imperfect and very much a conversation-in-progress. But I wanted to invite you into it with me.

🌀 So here’s the question again:What do you feel like you can’t forgive — and why?What might that reveal about how much love and acceptance you’re able to offer yourself?

I’d love to hear what this stirs up in you. You can reply here or leave a voice memo on Spotify if you’re listening there.

Thanks for sitting in the complexity with me.I love you. You’re everything.xo,Kimber